a personal moment...

we will return to bikes, messengers, and badassity later on.

im at a loss for words at the moment. we went to the doctor the other day. the lady doctor pulled out a microphone looking machine and put it on my wife's stomach. a minute later there was silence and then...bump, bump, bump, bump...

can you f*cking believe it?!! i can't. it's still somewhat unreal to me. we're having a kid. a little j.dot if you will. i don't know what to do or say. all i did was look at my wife but could barely hold the stare...i thought i might lose it. funny how a simple sound can bring up such emotions. thank God the lady doctor was there to talk and talk cause it really helped me out.

what can i say? what can i do? i have no way to repay my wife for everything she's done and given me. she said "yes" when i asked her on a date...she said "yes" when i asked her to marry me...and now, she's carrying our kid. there's absolutely nothing in this world that i can give her to make things even. jess has given me so much and im sitting here typing trying to figure out what i can do to return all the great gifts she has given me.

sorry jess...the best i can do is try. there aren't enough "love you's" and gestures in the world to repay for everything. my wife is a blessing that i do not deserve but am happy that she continues to be with me. like i said...all i can do is try jess. i will try to repay you everyday of my life. i know that even when it's all said and done it still won't be enough but believe me when i say...i will die trying to make things even. i love my wife...i love you jess...peace.